Company's coming: Does Everything Have to Be PERFECT?
When you are planning for company, does everything have to be perfect? Of course, you want to have a delicious meal, dress nicely, and have a joyful countenance. But what about everything else? Do you stress and pressure yourself about having the entire house in perfect order? Is that even possible? (To have it in perfect order, that is.)
Here are a few questions you must ask yourself when you are planning to have company:
- Why are they coming over?
- Is it a business or personal relationship?
- Are they family? church family?
Why are they coming over?
Are you having a realtor come over to look at your house? If so, it must be spick and span...how do you expect to sell your home if it is a mess when the realtor comes over? I don't necessarily consider a realtor company, but you may.
If you are just having a friends or family over, are they coming to see you or your house? You can make your home comfortable without it being perfect. Okay, you have a few toys out, a basket or two of laundry out, a few books out of place...are you going to enjoy yourself less if you house isn't perfect? Trust me, they will understand...especially if you have several small children. Afterall, they came to see you, RIGHT? They didn't come to inspect your home.
Is it a business or personal relationship?
This is a very important question to ask yourself. We have already discussed personal relationships: friends and family.
But what about business relationships? If your husband is having someone over to discuss business, someone like a client, try to make sure everything is clean...now, they are not coming over to see your clean house, either. But you should try to make a good impression for your husband, make sure the rooms that they will be in are clean. If they are eating with you, your kitchen or dining room should appear clean (not obviously a mess, that is), the same thing goes for your living room or office, and obviously the bathroom. If you have to take and stash some things away in a spare room or closet, that's okay. They are not doing a home inspection.
Just remember, don't stress...if they are human they will understand if things are not perfectly in order.
Are they family? church family?
Now our families usually know what state our home will be in when they come over, especially if they come unexpectedly, but again they are coming to visit with YOU! If things aren't perfect, no problem.
Trying to keep on top of things is important, but so are the relationships that you have with your children and family. If you are constantly nagging your children about cleanliness and yet your are not spending any quality time with them, how do you expect to have a good parent/child relationship. Now I am not saying to just let your house go and be a mess, but what I am saying is spending time with your children is more important than having a perfectly clean house. You can have a morning and afternoon clean-up time with your children, afterall you are teaching them life skills and they should help...they are members of the family and each member has a responsibility, but perfection isn't necessary.
Having church families over regularly is important as well. Showing hospitality is a way to reach out to church families and to get to know each other on a more personal level. They are your brothers and sisters in Christ. It also gives your children some time for socialization with other Christian families.
Now, does your house have to be perfect for church family? Let me ask you one question, did they come over to see how clean your house is? NO! They came over for Christian fellowship, they came to see you and your family, not your house! If you wait until your house is perfectly clean to show hospitality to your church family, you will never have anyone over. I know, because I have six children and my house is NEVER perfectly clean. I try to make sure things are comfortably clean...ie.: there may be extra things on the shelves, toys on the floor, books out of place, laundry baskets in the bathroom...it's not perfect, and until my children are older and there are no toddlers and preschoolers to drag things out, it won't be a perfect example of orderliness.
One thing that has stuck in my mind is something that Mrs. Jennie Chancey's (of LAF) mother told me once, and that is: "If you are coming over to see my house, make an appointment. If you are coming over to visit, come on over!"
What a statement! I have had a different attitude about hospitality ever since! Thanks, Mrs. N!
Blessings!
Heather
This article was inspired by an article that was written by Mama at Mamas Thoughts and Questions.
11 comments:
Heather, what a wonderful post! I was smiling the whole time, because it was meant just for me. As I posted before, I have a difficult time inviting people over when my house isn't "perfect". So, I miss out on fellowship. I love going to others houses and NEVER am I concerned with their home. Well, there has been a few that I needed to have some concern because of health issues with my little ones. (when there is cat poop on an baby item in the living room, there should be some concern.) BUT, I still was more interested in THEM, not the house. Anyway, thank you so much for your post. It was done gently with love.
Take care,
Mercy
Thank you for the timely reminder. I definitely needed to hear this right now!
I am so guilty of this, and I also go visit people and don't even notuice the house, so why are we like that?
Also, I bought some turkey hot gods today so I printed out your bun recipe and am going to make them long for hot dogs. Thanks!
Just came across this post & thought of you. :-)
http://www.gnmparents.com/no-more-excuses/
How's the sinus issue? Hope you're feeling better.
Take care,
Mercy
Thanks so much Mercy! That was a great article. I love the part about not apologizing...it was soooo refreshing. I tend to be overly obsessed sometimes about getting things "perfect" but find it nearly impossible to do so...I have six children...six blessed mess makers, so NO MORE EXCUSES!!!
Blessings!
Heather
Somehow I just can't see you obsessing like that. lol. You seem SO calm and like you just have that take it as it comes attitude to life :)
I made a comment about perfectionism over at the blog I posted at the bottom of this post (Mama at Mama's Thoughts and Questions)...that will explain things. I don't obsess as much anymore...but as a new wife and mother (now to many littles) I had a lot of pressure from family to keep it all together and organized.
I still struggle to this day when I know they are coming...but now it's only once every couple of years.
Blessings!
Heather
Oh, please know that was a typo and that we do not worship lunch meats here!
I have no way of changing the comment...but I think everyone knows we are talking about HOT DOGS...LOL! It happens to all of us, to bad blogger doesn't allow the authors of the comments to edit their comments like Homeschool Blogger.
Blessings!
Heather
sorry, not much time to comment. Babes in arms.Typing one handed...just wanted to let you know I did stop by!
mama
Thanks, just taking the time to say "Hello" means a lot to me!
Blessings!
Heather
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